Blessing the Children

Birkat habanim

ברכת הבנים

Visible layers

קידוש וזמירות לליל שבת

Kiddush and Zemirot for Shabbat Evening

ברכת הבנים

BLESSING THE CHILDREN

On the evenings of Shabbat and Yom Tov, many have the custom to bless their children.

To sons, say:

Gen. 48

Hebrew

יְשִׂמְךָ אֱלֹהִים
כְּאֶפְרַיִם וְכִמְנַשֶּׁה׃

Sephardi

Yesimcha Elohim
ke'Efrayim vechi-Menasheh:

English

May God make you like Ephraim and Manasseh.

To daughters, say:

Gen. 48

Hebrew

יְשִׂימֵךְ אֱלֹהִים
כְּשָׂרָה רִבְקָה רָחֵל וְלֵאָה׃

Sephardi

Yesimech Elohim
keSarah Rivkah Rachel veLeah:

English

May God make you like Sarah, Rebecca, Rachel and Leah.

Num. 6

Hebrew

יְבָרֶכְךָ יְהֹוָה וְיִשְׁמְרֶךָ׃
יָאֵר יְהֹוָה פָּנָיו אֵלֶיךָ וִיחֻנֶּךָ׃
יִשָּׂא יְהֹוָה פָּנָיו אֵלֶיךָ וְיָשֵׂם לְךָ שָׁלוֹם׃

Sephardi

Yevarechecha Adonai veyishmerecha:
Ya'eir Adonai panav elecha vichuneka:
Yisa Adonai panav elecha veyasem lecha shalom:

English

May the LORD bless you and protect you. May the LORD make His face shine on you and be gracious to you. May the LORD turn His face toward you and grant you peace.

Commentary

… the home is built: (1) lighting candles, symbolizing domestic peace; (2) blessing children, our responsibility and continuity; (3) welcoming angels, invisible signs of God’s protection; (4) praising the “woman of strength,” guardian of the home; (5) Kiddush, the dimension of holiness; (6) the blessing over bread, a symbol of sustenance as God’s gift; and (7) song and words of Torah, expressing our faith joyously.

BLESSING THE CHILDREN The custom of parents blessing their children has its origin in the blessing Jacob gave to his grandsons: “By you shall Israel invoke blessings, saying, May God make you like Ephraim and Manasseh” (Gen. 48:20). The blessing for boys repeats this phrase. That for girls invokes the four biblical matriarchs: Sarah, Rebecca, Rachel and Leah. This is followed, in both cases, by the priestly blessing. It is a beautiful custom, symbolizing the continuity of the generations in a way that is both tender and deeply spiritual. In the only verse to describe why Abraham was chosen, God says: “I have chosen him so that he will teach his children and his household after him to keep the way of the LORD, doing righteousness and justice” (Gen. 18:19). The bond between parents and children represents the continuity of the covenant across the generations.

קידוש Kiddush. As Kiddush is usually said “where we eat the meal,” in order to avoid a blessing “said in vain,” the wine is not drunk by an adult but by a child. The custom of saying Kiddush in the synagogue goes back to an age when the synagogue was also a hostel for visitors, who ate their meals nearby.

SHABBAT AT HOME Shabbat is a celebration of the Jewish home, and the home is the matrix of Judaism. The prophets compared the relationship between God and Israel with that between husband and wife, and between parent and child. The Hebrew word emuna, usually translated as “faith,” in fact means “faithfulness, fidelity,” the virtue born and sustained within the home. The love between husband and wife is the human redemption of solitude. The love between parent and child is the closest we come to immortality in this world, for it is through our children that we, and what we live for, live on.

Friday night is when, freed from the pressures of work, we can give time and loving attention to one another. It is also the time when we feel most profoundly the Shekhina, the Divine Presence, in the home. Our relationship to God and to those closest to us are both covenantal; that is to say, a mutual pledge of loyalty and love. Through the family and the quality of its relationships, divine blessings flow into the world.

Before the Friday evening meal, we enact sequentially the values on which …